Are you happy or fulfilled? 3 ways to find fulfillment over happiness.

I’ve never met anyone who didn’t want to be happy yet you can be happy and still feel very unfulfilled in life.

Happiness is a temporal emotion attached to momentary experiences.

We pursue happiness by moving up the corporate ladder, striving to make more money, buying a bigger house or more material possessions.

Seeking happiness isn’t wrong, it’s just limiting.

When we chase happiness, what we are all searching for is meaning and fulfillment and meaning and fulfillment is not found in the number of our material possessions.

When we pursue happiness, we are often choosing instant satisfaction over long term fulfillment. We do this to cover over our lack of fulfillment and meaning in our lives.

Happiness will come and go, but fulfillment will give you depth beyond one single emotion like happiness.

Fulfillment speaks to our inner soul; it connects us to something greater than ourselves.

I have learned to pursue fulfillment over happiness by:

1.Always remembering I am unique and valuable to humanity.
I believe we are all on this earth for a purpose. Our life matters.

2. Never making money and material possessions my primary focus.
I decided that true fulfillment has nothing to do with any amount of wealth or things I can accumulate. There is nothing wrong with wealth. I have learned that money only brings temporary happiness but never real fulfillment.

3. Help People.
For me, I find true fulfillment when I help others.
There are so many practical ways to contribute to humanity.
You can rake your elderly neighbor’s leaves, bring a hot meal to a friend, or homeless shelter. Be creative and look for ways to help people.

Pursuing fulfillment over happiness will bring you greater meaning to your life and real joy.

Question: What brings you fulfillment over happiness?

Become The Leader Others Want To Follow [Podcast]

 

In season 2 episode 8 of the Life Organized Podcast I discuss “Become the leader others want to follow”.

It’s not about being someone you’re not, it knowing who you are as a person and embracing thirteen characteristics of great leaders.

 

Show Notes:

Change is inedible; growth is optional – John C Maxwell
1. Embrace Change
2. Be Teachable
3. Set your life on a growth track
1. Read two books and one audiobook at the same time
2. *Side Note* Try Success Magazine
4. Humility
5. Servant Leadership
6. Character and Integrity
1. The Book: “Who You Are When No one is looking”
7. Be a good listener
8. Admit your mistakes
9. Be Vulnerable and transparent
10. Delegate Authority
11. Don’t be the smartest person in the room
12. Engage in Collaboration
13. Trust People

Question: What would you add to the list? 

I’m not busy, I’m wasting time [Blog Post]

 

31536000 this is how many seconds we have in a year. Over thirty-one million seconds.

How are you spending time?

Everyone has the same amount of time.

Twenty-four hours in a day, three hundred sixty-five days in a year… yadda, yadda, yadda.

If we all have the same amount of time why do we say things like “I’m too busy, ” or I don’t have enough time”?

If we all have the same amount of time why do we make these statements? because most of us are wasting time.

We spend way too much time trolling social media, watching Netflix, TV, Hulu, Cable, surfing the web or just choosing to do other things instead of what we know we should be doing at work or home.

We fail to prioritize our day around what will move us toward being able to do what we want to be doing.

Here’s what I mean, there’s nothing wrong with doing the activities listed above the key is to be intentional as to when and how long we spend doing them.

So how can we be more intentional with our time?

Try a time audit.
A time audit will help you to answer the when and how long questions. When I do a time audit, I track my activities throughout the day in fifteen-minute increments for three – four days this gives me a great snapshot of how I spend my time.

I believe much of the stress we carry in our life is due to how we spend our time.

We procrastinate and push off what we need/should accomplish to alleviate stress in our life by wasting time trolling social media, watching TV, surfing the web, etc. adding to our stress load because we’re ignoring the important things.

If you don’t track your time, you’ll never know where it went.

A time audit highlights the patterns and habits that contribute to wasting time. You may find that every day after work you come home, eat dinner and sit on the couch the rest of the night. Having a relaxing evening isn’t a bad thing, it’s when we develop a pattern of wasting hours in front of the television that leads to excessive time wasting and added stress.

Ask yourself:

What would happen if I took thirty minutes from the evening and exercised?
What if I took thirty minutes when I arrived home from work and picked up the house?
What if I spent time reading a book for fifteen minutes?
What if I spent fifteen minutes talking with my spouse/kids about their day or if you’re not married spent time calling a friend or loved one to check on how they are doing?

The above suggestions take only an hour and half of your entire day. Ninty minutes out of your whole day.

What if you went to bed a half hour earlier and woke up a half hour earlier and spent fifteen minutes of the thirty planning your day over a cup of coffee?

How would feel after following through on the above tasks each day? What would you add to the list?

Are you too busy of just wasting time?

Try doing a time audit to access areas where you may be wasting time unknowingly and then add in the positive activities that will help you feel on top of your schedule and less stressed.

[New Blog Post] Build The Year You Want

January 1st rolls around every year and the gym memberships increase, health food flys off the shelves and we declare that this is the year to________________fill in the blank.

We make our resolutions for the new year and all too often find ourselves with the treadmill becoming a coat hanger, our credit cards still maxed out and our jeans a little tighter from the holidays.

Why?

I believe there are three reasons: 
1. We focus on one specific area (Our New Years resolution)
2. We bite off more than we can chew and are left overwhelmed at the lack of results, so we quit.
3. We forget to look at our life holistically.

On New Year’s Day, I watched a morning show offer up horrible advice on how to set a New Year Resolution while ignoring other areas of life. No one talked how every decision we make affects the other.

Breakdown happens when we miss the big picture.

Men and women join the gym and go on a workout tirade going to the gym every day at 5 am and coming home after work exhausted with no energy to invest in other areas.

The new business owner launches his new business working a million hours while neglecting his wife and children.

If our New Years resolution is to start that new business, get in shape or anything else, we have to look at our entire life and look at the way each area is intertwined.

Dividing our life into categories can help us gain a better perspective on where to place our focus on any given day. I like to divide my life up into the following categories: Thoughts, Relationships, Finances, Career and Physical Health.

Just because we divide our life up into these categories doesn’t mean that they are not interconnected.

So where do we begin?

  • Step One: Build The Year You Want Questions
    • What do I want 2017 to look like in my relationships, my finances, physical health or business? You decide your focus. Create a vision for each area you want to improve.
      • Get specific.
      • Write down what it will feel like when your 2017 vision for each area comes to fruition.
      • Ask: “How will the vision for each area effect the other?
  • Step Two: Build The Year You Want Goals
    • The vision for the year we want will remain a daydream without specific goals set in stone, on a calendar.
      Here’s an example goal: In 2017 I want to learn the basics of Spanish and build on this language from there. I am going to wake up at 5 am and study Spanish for 30 minutes each morning Monday through Friday taking the weekends off. By waking up early, this will not infringe upon my current schedule. At the end of 2017, I will be able to carry on basic conversations with my Spanish speaking friends.
      This example shows how specific goals practiced everyday lead to exceptional outcomes.
  • Step Three: Build The Year You Want Accountability
    • Find someone you trust to hold you to not only your goals but to ensuring you are not getting out of balance in one particular area letting others go by the wayside. Accountability is not very enjoyable but one thing I know after years of being coached and coaching others is it works. A coach holds you accountable. A coach can be your neighbor, friend, co-worker, spouse, whoever.
  • Step Four: Build The Year You Want Execution
    • Designing the year you want is not usually very exciting along the way. You have to do the hard work. You have to show up every day even when you don’t want to. Everything comes down to waking up and do what you know you need to do today to get to where you want to be tomorrow.

With a vision of how you want your year to look, specific goals set on how you are going to get there, a trusted friend to hold you accountable, and the perseverance to see it through, you will accomplish things you never thought possible and have a fantastic 2017 of Building The Year You Want!

Question: What do you want 2017 to look like? Leave me a comment below on Twitter or Facebook

[New Blog/Podcast] My Dusty Books

Podcast Cover Life Organized

Welcome to this week’s blog and podcast. Feel free to read or listen.

 

I love books. I love to read, and I love the feeling of holding a physical book in my hand.

I have books that I have highlighted, written in the margins of dog-eared pages. That being said, almost all of my books are collecting dust.

I’m always looking for ways to declutter and as I stared at my bookshelf I realized that I not only had my books become clutter (to me) but I had an entire library of fantastic knowledge I could be sharing with others.

Since I’ve switched almost entirely to ebooks and audio books, I thought it was time to give away all of my physical books I deemed as “dust collectors.”

There is nothing wrong with owning physical books at all. For me, I see the greater value my books can have in the hands of others than just sitting on my shelf.

When I made the decision to give my books away, I went through a whole slew of emotions.

I would pick up a book and feel the anxiety of letting go rush through my body. The anxiety caught me off guard at first. I was surprised that I felt this way.

I soon realized that the anxiety was my attempt to hold onto the memories attached to the books, not the books themselves.

My books had become a shrine rather than a library.

I think this happens with a bunch of things in our life. We are trying to hold on to the memories the physical things brings us when that thing is just collecting dust.

Is there anything wrong with keeping items that have a sole purpose of bringing us sentimental value?

Of course not.

This is my personal journey of decluttering and owing less so I can add value to others. For me, my books have become something that can add even greater meaning to my life by giving them away.

The question I asked myself that allowed me to move forward with my plan to give my books away was this:

“Will this book add more value sitting on my bookshelf or in the hands of someone else?”

My answer was a resounding yes.

I didn’t just give them away to the local thrift store. I wanted my collection to go somewhere that I knew they would be read and help people learn and grow.

I have the incredible privilege of being on the board of a non-profit organization that helps men and women become re-acclimated into society after prison.

I was able to donate the books to them knowing that the books that impacted me will affect many more lives for years to come.

What items do you have in your home that could add value to others?

Make a contribution in the lives of others by giving away your dusty books or other items.

[New Blog & Podcast] RHYTHM & FLOW

Podcast Cover Life Organized-5


Rhythm: “an interval during which a recurring sequence of events occurs.”

Having a RHYTHM to our life is a wonderful to way to maintain practical, simple, living and keep our life organized. Our RHYTHM is the reoccurring appointments on our calendar and the regular routines we follow every day.

Yet, there are times when our RHYTHM is interrupted by life.

Life is not static. It’s always moving, changing and shifting interrupting our scheduled RHYTHM.

It’s in these moments we learn to pivot from the structure RHYTHM to the pliable state of FLOW.

FLOW: “being abundantly present.”

FLOW is our ability to bend, move and maintain focus and clarity on what’s most important when our life rhythm is disrupted.

It’s ok to let things go and take a break from our RHYTHM when life piles on the unexpected.

The reason our stress level goes up is that we still feel we need to cram in our RHYTHM on top of the unexpected interruptions which instantly kills our ability to enter into a FLOW.

Most days our lives clip along to the RYTHM we have scheduled with little or no interruptions.

This past week I was unable to write or record new podcasts due to life interruptions even though I had scheduled appointments for writing and recording on my calendar. I needed to FLOW with what life had for me instead of trying to make my planned RHYTHM fit.

I could have become stressed out and tried to get everything done. I know If I had attempted to get it all done it would have been because of the false expectations placed on myself not because I had to.

I desire to be consistent for my tribe of listeners, but I also understand that all of you are very understanding when I let all of you know that I am going to miss a week (which rarely happens).

Like the stream of a river, I maintained a relaxed state of FLOW and made the most of my experience looking for ways to be abundantly present focusing my attention on who was in front of me rather than having my thoughts somewhere else trying to figure out how to ensure my RHYTHM schedule was maintained.

  • RHYTHM helps us maintain structure in our lives.
  • FLOW helps us focus on the important things regardless of our structure.
  • RYTHM helps us stay on top of everyday tasks/chores.
  • FLOW reminds us to let go of RHYTHM when the unexpected shows up.
  • RHYTHM sets the pace of our day like the rising and setting of the sun.
  • FLOW gives us permission to ignore our daily pace to focus on the present moment.
  • RHYTHM are the daily steps we take towards our goals.
  • FLOW reminds us that our goals will be there tomorrow.

Podcast Show Notes

No notes this week!

[New Podcast] Optimist, Pessimist, or Realist?

Podcast Cover Life Organized

How do you view life?
Are you the optimist that sees the glass half full? Are you the pessimist that sees the glass half empty? Maybe it’s time to be a realist and see the glass for what it is…a half a glass of liquid.

In episode #26, I discuss how becoming a realist leads to keeping our Life Organized.


Show Notes: 

Books

30 Day Breakthrough Journal

Sponge Leadership 

The Great Exploration

[New Blog Post] The internal hold of external things

 

The internal of external-2

Stuff.

It has a hold on all of us. We place value and worth on our things when in the end it’s just stuff. That last sentence is easier to type than to live out.

Our emotional attachment to our stuff may cause us to feel important or appear in a certain light to our peers. Our emotional attachment might have sentimental value because of the memories associated with the object.

Either one makes it difficult to declutter and move closer to the physical side of having our Life Organized.

Because getting rid of external things does not necessarily rid us of their internal hold.

We can be materialistic with twenty thousand items or twenty in our home.

We can simplify and still be greedy.

This is why having our Life Organized is less about what you are decluttering (though important) and more about who you are becoming.

Ask yourself:

What external stuff has an internal hold on my life?

What were the first three objects that came to mind? Take a moment to write them down.

Now ask:

What’s causing me to want to keep these items? Write down your answers.

Then ask:

If I let go of these things, how will this simplify and add value to my life?

Honesty is key to living Life Organized emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Being honest with ourselves about what has a hold on us and is getting in the way of what’s most important.

Life Organization is a daily journey for me. It’s looking internally, every day and asking with complete honesty “What am I holding on to? And What do I need to declutter in every area of my life?.”

What I have experience on my journey of living Life Organized, is every time I simplify externally, something is simplified internally in my head and heart. So this question has had a great impact on my life.

The hold of the external becomes less and less as we walk the path of gaining emotional, physical, and spiritual organization but I don’t believe it ever goes away.

This is the great juxtaposition. The taunt is that the external is always with us.

The more we simplify, the more we can focus on the important things like our relationships, and our emotional, physical and spiritual wellbeing, and the quieter the voice of the external becomes.

Question: How did the above questions help you to identify and address external items that have an internal hold? I would love to hear from you! Leave me a comment below.